Drifting Thoughts

Confession...

2010-06-23T01:24:00.005+05:30

How do I embark on this post? Hmmmm... May be the topic is bit irrelevant to the content...

Who cares dude??? Fine.. Let me start with a question...

What am I???
A million dollar question huh...

What do I do???
WTF???

Am partially a computer programmer and partially a project manager...

The next question???
Am I doing something that adheres to the protocol of a manager or a programmer...? Who knows???

Let me think...
Programmers are the guys who actually design the system... In a nutshell, an architect of the system... But am not even close to that... So am a coder... Not a programmer.. Let's forget it...

Let's come to the next one..
Am I a project manager???
He he he... Good joke... Project management... I jus came to know that only 32% of the projects across the globe follows the protocol... The phases of project management are really difficult to incorporate... My project... That's a different story...

So let me ask this question again...
What am I???
Half baked :-)

Leave this... Am I applying something that I learnt in my college???
Before that... What did I do in my college???
Myriad of questions...

Actually I believe Engineering is more difficult than Medicine... Nor that am comparing... But IMHO, it's like this... Medical practitioners tend to recollect the things they learnt in their college days and apply it... But Engineers, they gotta recollect the things they learnt and change the dimensions of their thinking to create new ideas... Engineering is all about creating new ideas... Ideas.. The numero uno of all inventions...
But are we engineers doing that??? Let's not generalize...
Am i doing it??? Good question again...

Most of the Engineering grads from our country thinks that stepping into an IT industry is their final destination... Few grads are really proud of it.. Wearing the company tag gives them pleasure... Telling someone that they work for a software firm gives them ultimate pride...

But for me... I dunno... It doesn't.. The first thing I do as soon as I come outta my office is to remove my ID and keep it inside my pocket... I never wanted to be noted as an IT guy... Somehow I developed a feeling that it's definitely not my cup of tea... May be i wanted to be in a minuscule group... And yes.. It's not even good for the country... Electronics, Electrical, Mechanical, Civil, Production, Automobile, Architect, etc etc etc...Most of these Engineers finally end up in a software firm... Then why should they actually study the concepts of their core subjects..?? Simply our government can void all these courses and just promote computer science and Information Technology... Other Industries are really slumping these days... The growth in Mechanical, civil industries are not upto the mark... Actually to gain a place in a safer zone, we actually spoil other industries and just concentrating on one sector... This growth is not stable and of course it's gonna show it's effects in the near future... I will be definitely there to witness this.. :) I shouldn't blame the work which provided me a social status for the past 5 years.. But this is not the place where I belong... Somewhere I belong...

But do I search that place??? Have I identified that??? Partially Yes... I wanted to start my own firm... I wanna be a boss of myself... Also I really developed an affinity to be a part of film making... That's my passion... But do i take any steps to achieve that??? Ha ha ha... Cos of the society... May be... Am living in a safer zone and I don wanna get rid of it...

When one becomes successful??? When his passion and work are the same... This is the basic mantra of success as far as I know.. But most of us are not following it cos of various reasons...

Let me stop these complaints and get back to my work... Let's see how I take my life from here.. Hope for the best.... :)

My first .......

2010-05-23T02:27:00.006+05:30

I was just holding her hand. It was a nice twilight. The weather was good. I could feel the breeze that carried her scent. I could sense coolness of sea water under my feet. I was walking with her. And I could see that the horizon will never end when I walk with her. Errrrrrrrr.... I was about to open my eyes after a sound sleep. I hated myself for discontinuing the beautiful dream I had. The morning was good. None knows what's gonna happen when one wakes up. Something good, something astounding, something hilarious, may be something bad. Life is full of surprises!!! None knows how to unveil the sieve that binds the next moment secret. I just woke up. Thought the time was around 7 AM. I was too lazy to check the time. Finally decided to check my mobile. Hell!!! It was 9 AM. Someone was shouting outside my room."Raj... Don't you have to go to work today??" Common dude. You got to hurry up. The time when I had my breakfast, it was quarter to 10 AM. Took my bike and hurried to my office.

Office work was usual. Manager's annoyance, peer's doubts, client's deadline,status calls, etc... Anyone working in a service oriented corporate firm (ofcourse most of the younger generations) knows this truth. It was quotidian. And today it was more, since I missed the morning status call which happened around 9AM, the time when I was holding my imaginary girl friend's hand in an imaginary sea shore:-) Finally I was able to free myself from the routine and left the office. I reached the bike stand only to find that my bike had flat tyres. The day didn't start well in the morning and how it's gonna end in a smooth way, I thought to myself, blaming someone other than me for all these stupid things. I decided to park my bike in office and take public transport to reach my home. I went to the nearby bus stop and waited there for my bus.

It was one fucking evening. The weather was soothing. A gentle breeze that will make you to fall in love with nature. As I was enjoying this beautiful weather, multiple things were happening around the world. In a remote place of southern India, a young couple were happy to get positive report that they are gonna have a baby. In Eastlands stadium of Manchester, the entire crowd waited for the final goal. In Madison Square Garden, NY, L9 troops were getting ready for their first performance. And me. I waited in the bus stop without knowing that this moment is gonna change my life forever. I couldn't believe what I saw on that day and that will be cherished by me forever. Just opposite to the bus stop where I stood, there was another big building, something like a mall that houses various shops,offices and things like that. There came my angel. I use the word 'my' cos I decided she was mine the moment I saw her. She was wearing a blue jean, a pink short kurta and a coolers. Within a jiffy I decided that she's the one for me. Who knows who's made for whom. It all happens. Somewhere, something decides this. I couldn't get my eyes outta her. I thanked someone other than me who did all the stupid things since morning so that I could meet the love of my life. I stood there speechless, watching her. I could feel that the whole world is in front of me when I see her. Angel, Cinderella, everything seems to be an understatement when I tried to describe her. Again an interruption... A car came in front of her and a guy came outta the car and gently took her into it. Fuck. Who the hell is this? May be her bf or brother??? No. That should be her bro. She's definitely mine. Amidst all these ambivalence, I felt butterflies in my stomach when I just think about her. With all her thoughts in my heart, I went to bed.

The next day when I woke up, I felt something different. I wanted to go to the office early. Not because of the work or status call. Well... You know. Again I went to that bus stop to see her. As per my calculations, she came there exactly at the same time as the previous day. After sometime, the same car came. The same guy. I made a promise to myself, whatever may be the case, every evening exactly at the same time, I will go to that bus stop and wait for her arrival. And this continued for several days, weeks, months. I never bothered to know who she's, what she's doing in that building, who that guys is. But I continued to watch her. I did nothing other than watching her. Some of the guys are like this. They know what they are doing is not right. But they continue to do that. They never get the courage to talk to the girl they like, tell her how much they love, what they feel for her. I just realized that am jus one of them. I told my friends about all these and they insisted me to get her details and to proceed further. How could I? Days jus went by. And I never missed an evening to see her.

That day was no different from the previous day except one thing. As usual I waited for her near the bus stop and I had to go thru this, which I never imagined I would. I just tried to cross the road and talk to her for the first time.Myriad of things were going thru my mind. How am I gonna call her? What am I gonna talk to her. Nothing. I haven't prepared anything. Let it be extempore. And everything came to an end. I could feel that something is happening to me. Couldn't explain it. Am sure that, it was not good. I jus realized that I was hit by a car and am flying in mid air. I know I will be good. I will wake up the next day realizing everything happening now was a dream. I will be as good as I was before. I will go and tell her how much I love her. BANG. That was the last thing i remembered before I woke up in a strange place something like a hospital. I could see my parents, relatives, friends, around me crying. I tried to tell them that am fine but in vain. I was not able to talk. I begged god to make them feel that am good. Also I told him,no matter what happens, when am free from this shit, first thing I wanna see is to see her face, I need to watch her, for the rest of her life.There is no greater agony than bearing an untold story inside you.

The next day, same bus stop, she came outta of that building and waited for her car. The same car, the same guy. But today something was different. The guy hugged her tightly and told her "Congrats sis.. Today is a special day for you. You'll never forget this day in your life'. He also told her sis that they aren't going home but to some other place. They went to the same hospital. The same hospital where Raj was admitted. Her bro talked to the doctor and came to her, held her hand and told the happy news she could ever hear. 'Sis, you don't need to attend braille classes. You don't need to wear the coolers. You got a donor. You can see the beauty of the whole world." They were waiting for this moment for years. She had a rare condition and that made her to wait this long to get a possible match. For the first time in his life, he saw the happiness in her.

She : Thanks bro... Thank you so much...
He : why to thank me??? We got to thank the donor
She : Who's that?
He : His name is Raj. He was working in the office opposite to the building where you went for your braille classes. Yesterday he met with an accident and now... Am sorry. He's no more. But he has already donated his eyes. And his family members were magnanimous enough to donate his eyes.

The surgery went well and as Raj wished, the first thing she saw when she opened her (no.. may be Raj's) eyes was her face. As Raj wished he can watch her for the rest of her life but thru her. His love for her will never stop as it's eternal.

Life is too short. None knows the next moment truth. Suddenly one day we'll wake up, realizing things are changing, they are not as we thought, our friends, loved ones growing old, things that passed us, things that can't be changed now. But somewhere, someone will be waiting for us. But we need to tell them they are important to us as we are for them. It's important to live the life to the fullest while we are alive. And yes, Mark Twain must be a legend to tell this, Twenty years from now we will be more disappointed by the things we didn't do than by the ones we did do.

Note :
This is my first work of fiction. Jus got this story line in a dream and wanted to work on it. And here am done with that after adding necessary flavors... And thanks to my sis (or should i call her my bro) who reviewed the draft version.

Motorcycle(s) and Me...

2010-05-10T00:25:00.018+05:30

Like any other guys, I always loved riding motor cycles... Right from my teenage, riding bikes has become my passion... I guess, the motorcycle am owning now is hmmm 1,2,...... Yes 7th one... And I can proudly say that this is 'My motorcycle'... Cos I bought it with my own money and not my parents' :-)... And I bought it on a very special day... 1st September 2005... The day which will always be close to my heart for some other special reason... And that's the reason why I don wanna sell it... Hell yeah... Am an emotional idiot... :-(

And I always wanted to own some kinda hi-fi sports bike... Honda CBR, Yamaha R1, Suzuki Hayabusa... He he he... At that time it was too much for a fresh grad who was just outta his college... So I decided something... Let's get a Honda 150 CC motorcycle and remodel it to look like Honda CBR... That's much easier... As simple as this huh... But my dad... He didn't allow me to do that... He's a kinda person who maintains his car more than anything else... Daily he used to clean his car for at least 20 min... I still remember, when I was a kid (still am :-)), he used to love his Yezdi MC... I too loved it...

Me: Please pa... Let me remodel my MC...
Dad: Hell no... It's looking good now and u'll screw the looks as well as the performance... No way...
Me: Please pa... You'll really love the new looks and I've already enquired the price...
Dad: No way son..
Me: This is my bike and I'll do it... And that's why I bought it with my own money...
Dad: U won't listen... At least wait for a year... Service it regularly and maintain properly... U can remodel it at the end of first year...

That's what I was waiting for... He thought that I'll forget it after 1 year... But me huh.... No way... Exactly after 1 year I did it... I didn't even inform my parents... Well... I actually loved it... Though it's bit difficult to ride and it's heavier... I loved it... I had a pinch of pride when someone asked me about my bike... Hell yeah.. That's my bike...

But my mindset had a shift 3 weeks b4.... It's all cos of a small accident... This is my second bike accident... In the first one, I narrowly escaped w/o even a small scratch... That happened in hmmmm,... 2001... My god... It was b4 9 years...... Actually my friend and I were coming back from entrance exam coaching and a car passed us... And that irritated me and I overtook it with my Samurai (The bike with no problem!!!)... But I didn't notice a speed breaker and applied the break and the car hit us... My friend who was a pillion rider flew from the bike and fell down and I still dunno how I escaped without a minor scratch... Thank God...

And this time... After 9 years... 14th or 15th April 2010... It was dark... And I didn't wear my helmet... I wasn't racing... Jus a normal speed of 50 kmh... Suddenly I realized that there was a barricade in front of me... Lotsa gravels.... And some large stones in front of the barricade...
Hell no... I applied both the breaks and that's the last thing i remember... The next few seconds were completely outta my control...

I can feel that am falling down...
I can feel that am trying to save me w/o getting hurt but in vain...
I can feel that my ankle failed to balance...
I can feel that my leg, hand and face are getting hurt...

But I can't do anything.... Everything is happening outta my control...

Myriad of thoughts went thru my mind in that jiffy....

Will I see my family again???
BANG...........

I still have some pending duties... Will I complete it???
BANG...........

Shit... I didn't tell her that I still love her...
BANG...........

Will I see my friends again???
BANG...........

Will my dream come true???
BANG...........

Or will I become Anbesivam Nalla???
BANG...........

Cos me and by bro were avid fan of Kamal and we were discussing Anbe sivam the day before this incident and that's why... :-)

I made a promise that I will write a post on this incident if am alive... Thank god... And am here... Am writing it...

A guy came to help me and lifted me... The first question I asked him...

Howz my face??? Is it hurt more??? (Chummave namma muham oru mathiri than irukkum.. Ithula ithu veraya???)

He convinced me and gave water to clean the wounds... I couldn't walk properly and somehow cleaned my wound... I checked for any head injury... No blood from head... Thank god... Nothing happened to my eye... Even if a tiny gravel hit my eye, I would be sitting here as a blind guy... Thank god again... Nothing happened...
He's one such a noble guy... Thanks a lot man... I didn't even get his name...

Then I thought I could manage and started my MC... Oops... Jus 2 min,.. I could see that the world in front of me is darkening and am feeling sleepy... Hell... Am fainting... Stopped my MC, got down and laid down on the pavement... Didn't know that am lying near a gutter... No way... After sometime again I started to ride... No way... I couldn't... Stopped again... I haven't got the guts to inform my parents... They'll feel bad... Called my friend... He came and helped me to reach home...

That's the end of the story... And one imp thing.. All these things happened jus one week b4 my exams... Ha ha ha... And am fortunate that I've escaped w/o any major injury... No fracture, no stitches... Jus deep bruises... That's it... God's great...

And that's the end of my bike fantasy... The first thing I did was to remodel my MC back to the original form... Now am using my helmet even if I wanna go to the nearby shop... Am not crossing 70 kmh... :-)

And that's all about it...

It's all about relationship...

2010-02-14T00:20:00.008+05:30

Today is valentine's day... So this post is definitely gonna be something on love amongst 'n' number of other posts that are gonna flow today...

Love - Yeah.. It's a quintessential of perfect complexity... A word that brings butterflies in stomach, feels like being on cloud # 9 for someone, pain in the heart, tears in the eye for someone... Sometimes both...

Hey...B4 that I jus wanna visit my 2009 V day's post... Time flies by... Huh.. Too fast...

Love... It's a locus searching for particular coordinates in a 3D space... Once valid coordinates have been found, it can satisfy most complex, illogical, irrational equations... But sometimes it fails to satisfy even a simple equation in life.... When one or more coordinates completely mismatches the rest... So what are these coordinates? 2 living beings/things and the bond that binds them... The bond... Most important one.. Generally failures happen because of wrong bonding... The bond may take any value, friendship, infatuation, soulmate, lust, etc etc etc... But the 2 persons who are linked by this bond should definitely be aware of these bonding...

We see couples everywhere... In temples, beaches, coffee shops, discotheque,,, Sometimes moving freely, sometimes with a hint of fear... Focusing just on the prenuptial soulmate relationship of a boy and a girl, I've just broadly categorized few types of love... Hey.. This's just my perception... This is my blog and I have the right to express my views... :-)

The perfect couples
These guys, met by chance or fate or anything, know they are made for each other... They'll cherish the beauty of love, make the impossible possible, travel the entire journey of life with rejoice, never give up on each other, always gives the best to each other... Whatever happens, they'll stay together forever forever in their life...

The Pseudos
Hmmmm... They too know the truth that they are not made for each other... For them, love is just an avocation, a pastime... They just need a company for time being... They are also clear in their thoughts... A defined path awaits them... They just part their ways at the right time and never look back at their past... As simple as this...

The patsy and the shammer
Oh my... The type that I hate the most... Either the boy or the girl will be bedazzled by the other... It's a mixture of cat#1,2... One from cat #1 and the other from cat # 2... One is serious and ready to give his/her life to the other and the second one just enjoys his/her company and wants to get rid of this relationship at some part of life... Here one will be seriously hurt while for the other it's just a passing cloud, water in the stream...

The flummoxed
The crazy thing... They don't know what they are upto... They can't clearly define their relationship... They don't even know whether it's love or friendship or infatuation or just nothing... They not only confuse themselves but also their surrounding environment... They are simply perplexed, not knowing their bonding... They may end up as cat # 1 or cat # 2.. Their situation is just as the situation of a cat on the wall...

Well apart from these there are many guys or gals who tell others that they hate love, or they are in search of love, or some despos who are madly in search of a relationship or few guys who were in cat # 1 and finally end up in a breakup due to some strange stupid reasons... Am not gonna talk abt them... Probably I will, in my future posts...

What am I gonna do today...??? I feel like spending this evening in thiruvanmiyur beach, the place I won't forget in my life... But I won't...

And for u... If you wanna read a soothing,poignant, love story on this very special day, please read 'I too had a love story' by Ravinder Singh...

An ending quote (from the same novel),
Not everyone in this world has the fate to cherish the fullest form of love. Some are born, just to experience the abbreviation of it...

Paradigm shift in tamil cinema

2010-01-19T22:38:00.007+05:30

I actually decided to write about something else but finally ended up writing this cos of various reasons...

Am a real movie buff and an avid fan of Selvaraghavan... So I watched his latest venture 'Ayirathil Oruvan', the very first day... I liked the movie like anything... Especially the second half of the movie... I should say, he has framed a new paradigm for tamil cinema... None has given such a well crafted movie of this genre in tamil industry...

Mostly the movies that revolves around history will only concentrate on past factual events... Or some movies of treasure hunt genre will purely be fictitious... But this is a perfect mixture of history and fiction, which makes it first of it's kind in tamil film industry...

One can see Selva's hard work in collecting all the facts and associating it with modern science... wow... He should be really proud of his work... Especially the second half, which totally portrays a new tone compared to the first half... The sequences, the taking... I should say, it's simply amazing to see such kind of movies in tamil rather than the typical masala type movies... Also the music is really soothing,... My favorite is 'Celebration of life' which is just enchanting...

But this movie is receiving mixed reviews.... While watching the second half, most of the guys in the theater were really pissed off and they actually wanted to leave the hall asap...I dunno why... I was totally into the movie surprised at the taking of the movie... But most of the guys didn't like it at all... I didn't really want to hear those and enjoyed the movie till the end...

Later I tried to get others opinion as I really wanted to know the reason for their acts... From their reviews I noticed that there are few flaws in the movie... Especially the difference in tone... the first half is entirely different from the second half... Everyone who watched the first half with that zeal will definitely expect the second half to have something like a 'Time travel' or 'A splendid flash back' or 'Reincarnation stories'... But in contrast Selva gave a new tone to the movie that completely ignores the tone of first half... Though he gave it as a surprise element, most of the audiences are not able to digest the complete shift in tone... Also the way he portrayed few sequences in climax... Hmmmm... He should have given a second thought about it...

When I tried to explain these things to few persons, they were not accepting it... Instead they thought I was just trying to be different by praising this movie... Ha ha ha... why should I??? Is Selva paying me to do this??? But few guys , I should say like minded guys... They really enjoyed the movie the same way I enjoyed it... So am not being different... Thank god... And when we discussed few things, we ended up in praising the same scenes that I enjoyed the most...

To wind up, am not saying this is a movie that will be liked by everyone... It's only for miniscule audience... But one can definitely watch it for the Selva's hard work...

Gibbers

2009-11-30T23:18:00.008+05:30

Fell in love and it's time to rise...

Let me dream about u...
Let me hold ur hand...
Let me walk with u...
Let me live with u...
That would be the best part of my life....

The moments we laughed together...
The moments we exchanged our views...
The moments you leaned on my shoulder...
The moments you held my hand...
Dreaming what we were....
All those golden moments for making strangers outta us????

You stole my heart...
You stole my memories...
You stole my senses...
You stole my soul...
You stole me...
Now without all these,,, How can i survive???

It's strange to know that you have selective amnesia...
It's even stranger that you can actually select what you wanna forget..,

Its flowing thru my veins,,,
Its crawling in my heart...
Its growing as i grow...
Its smothering in my mind...
I don wanna live with it...
I don wanna live without it...
I jus wanna remember it... Till my end...
Mixed with my soul....

You played all the strings of my heart,,,
Now my heart has become mute without u...

All bad has a good thing in it....
And all good has a bad thing in it...

Am trying to forget u...
But am remembering u every moment..
I love u every time you come to my mind..
Oh yes... I love you every moment...
Why this to me???

Am searching for you everywhere...
But am not able to find u...
Am losing you when i search u...
so i stopped searching you...
So you can be with me always...

I've always been with you when u needed me...
Now you are not with me when i need you badly...

The one who loved all the stupid and simple things in me is now hating the whole of me....

She understood all the complex things in me that I found difficult to put in words....

I know am nothing,...
But the girl with me is more than anything...
Knowing this made me something....

Am missing all the sweet disturbances I had.....
What's life without those tiny little disturbances..??

Am falling in love with you each and every moment I think about you...

Before,
Even a single thought about u brought me butterflies in my stomach....
Now,
Even a single thought about u is bringing me tears....

Often am thinking of being with u....
Sometimes it feels better than heaven...
And sometimes it's worse than hell....

Love means never having to say you're sorry

2009-11-22T16:12:00.018+05:30

Hmmm... It's been very long time since i completely indulged myself into a good book... I had only been a bathroom reader these days....

Great poet Mahakavi once said,

காலை எழுந்தவுடன் படிப்பு
பின்பு கனிவு கொடுக்கும் நல்ல பாட்டு
மாலை முழுதும் விளையாட்டு
என பழக்க படுத்தி கொள்ள பாப்பா

And am following this earnestly... Yes... As soon as i wake up, I search for the book kept near my bed, go to the bathroom, switch on the FM player in the bathroom and enjoy both the book and the music while attending nature's call.... And hell yes... Still am spending my evenings in gym....
But am not able to enjoy the continuity of any book because of this interrupted reading... Last Sunday (15th Nov 2009) I badly wanted to read a book at one stretch... But I couldn't go out to get a new book since it was raining like hell... One of my roommates has got few books...

Before continuing this, I must tell something about that sloth... He and I have a common taste when it comes to Movies and Books... Just these two I guess... But he's the lazzzzzzziest guy in our room who really find it difficult to make up his own bed when he wakes up... Hmmmm... May be the second laziest guy... He got a forerunner (obviously not me)... But he's good at one thing as far as am concerned... He's good at finding the download source for the movies... Just name the movie... He'll download the best print one can ever find... :-) Thanks for all his efforts without which I couldn't have watched most of the movies... And yes.... Thanks in advance for the upcoming downloads... :-)

Oh yes... Till now I could only find little relation between the topic and the content.... K fine... Let me come to the point... Where was I??? Yes... He got chetan Baghat's new venture "2 states"... I've always loved chetan's works and i know it for sure this book won't be boring.... He was reading the last part... In the mean time i thought of reading some other book... I badly needed to quench my reading urge.... I checked the mini library (may be around 30 to 40 books, i should have used the word micro mini library!!!) in our home... There I found "Love Story" by Erich Segal... It's the smallest book (less # of pages) there and that was the real reason why I chose to read that book in first place... I read one of the reviews in the back cover.... It read "This is for those Who were in luv, who are in luv, who will be in luv"... I got 2 out of 3 (am not gonna tell which 2)... So obviously I got to read this...

The very first line itself stole me.... When am reading the book I could feel some kinda similarity between this novel and Alaipayuthey movie... I guess Maniratnam has beautifully crafted this story to fit perfectly for Indian audiences... One could taste romance in each and every dialogue between Oliver and Jenny (the couples)... One could feel the joy and pain of love more than they actually need.... Hmmm... It may seem like am exaggerating things here... May be am... But one should really read this book once to feel the real color of love... I just can't get my eye out of the book in the last ten pages... No words to describe it actually... Oh yes... The topic of this post is none other than the tag line of this novel...

Then I googled to get details about this book and found that paramount pictures actually made a movie with the same title... Hurray... Downloaded it and watched it without any second thought... As usual the screen version is bit shorter than the paper version, but i loved the chemistry between the couples...

Generally when we are madly after something/someone we will be forced to get more details about the same and we wanted to remain in the same feeling for sometime.... That happened to me in this case... After I read that book, I couldn't stop myself to go and read another love story... Then i started with "2 states"... That's also a nice love story to read... The gist given in the back cover of the book simply tells you the entire story... But my quest for love stories didn't stop after this...

The next day I visited landmark in my office and got another book... "Those small lil things in love and life" by Rahul Saini... Oh yes... That's not up to the level I expected... Now I've started with my 4th novel in love genre... "Nothing for you my dear, Still I love u" by Arpit Dugar.... Les see where this's gonna take me....

Strange event???

2009-10-04T18:10:00.005+05:30

This is an interesting thing happened probably some 4 or 5 months back...

My Dad, Mom, Bro and I went to visit my grandparents in Trichy... After the visit, we boarded the bus to my place... We were in a bus comfortably sitting.... Our bus was about to start and suddenly my brother told that the other bus standing next to ours will reach before ours... So we thought of moving to that one and we did that in a hurry...

The first bus left the bus stand and we were in this new bus... This bus also started and after 30 mins of journey my mom told us that she missed her reticule... We thought she had some useless things in that bag.. But to our surprise she told that she had money around Rs.2500 in that bag... We searched the entire bus and found nothing... Later she told that she might have missed it in the previous bus while trying to get down in a hurry... So that's the end of the story... We thought somebody is lucky enuf to get that money.. We started yelling at my mom... Finally my mom told that it's her hard earned money and that will come to her if that's destined... We all slept except my brother.. Cos he thought it was his mistake asking us to move to other bus at the last moment... He was checking each and every bus we passed and passing us to see if that was the bus we boarded initially... Nothing helped...

Finally we reached our place and tried to lodge a complaint in Transport security office... We waited there for some 30 mins and nobody came there... It was around 10:30 P.M.. Finally we went to information center and told them about the incident... They started asking us about the bus #, conductor name etc etc etc.. Have someone noted down the bus number before boarding the bus??? That was a lesson.... It might help us one way or the other... After this incident i made it as a practice to note down the bus #, before boarding the bus... And finally they told us to forget about the money... This was the thing told by them...

"Are you still believeing that you will get your money back???"
"You are in 21st century and you know the general tendency of people ..."
"Even if someone gives back the bag to us it's not sure they will return it with money.."

We lost the hope and reached home... A surprise was waiting for us... Our servant maid told us that someone called and told that he is having a handbag that was found in the bus... Oh yes... A sigh of relief... We are not sure who he is... My mom had her visiting card in that bag that had our home landline number... Still we were not sure that we will get our money back or not... But anyways... Let's give it a try....

Next day morning... A middle aged man in his 40s came to our house.... He handed over that bag to my mom... My mom had her IMA ID card in that bag that had her photo... So he verified the face and gave the bag to my mom... He told us to check everything... None will believe it... Not even a single paise was missing... My gosh.,.. I was like... 'Oh my god'... Still we have these kind of human beings in the world... I thanked him and got his name... Anbukkarasu...

He told that he got this bag in the bus and asked everyone sitting near him... Later he got the card in that bag and thought of giving it in-person since the card had the address... He told that he called previous night to make us not to worry about the bag.... Such a wonderful human being...

Everyone in our family thanked him and finally told him that we are in his debt...

Dream vs Reality

2009-09-07T23:35:00.004+05:30

This is probably the shortest post of mine...

I just had a thought today... Most of us are worrying about making our dream come true... Like our ex-president Dr. APJ rightly said, it's better to dream.. Doing so will make us achieve better...

But am not sure if anyone thinks like this... Why can't things happened in real life just vanish like a dream???

I know it's bit eccentric... But this thought swirls over my mind again and again... Most of the time in my sleep i do believe that am dreaming something... But when i wake up, it's hard to accept that its already happened... :-(

With perseverance we can make our dream, a reality...
But never in our life a reality can be changed to a dream... It will stay with us forever...

Back from Quietus

2009-09-01T00:15:00.001+05:30

Yes... I've been a torpid for the past 3 to 4 months... Why??? Just crossed a new stage of my life... Oneway its good, in other way it hurts a lot...
But its jus a new experience i shoud say....

Hmmm... Where should i start??? K... Lemme start with the day when i landed in my home country... Its been 2 years since i had a fresh breath of Indian air...
I clicked most of the places where i've been in tampa right from my cubicle till office privy :-)... Started from there with lotsa expectations and delight....

In NY, they asked me to check in my cabin bag since it's too heavy... And so i did..... From NY to Dubai i just ate 3 times, watched around 5 movies... I cant sleep cos of the anticipation.... And finally landed in Dubai... Had a nice experience in Dubai... I was waiting to board the connecting flight to Chennai... There came an announcement.... They were actually calling a passenger whose name is bit different.... I thought they were calling some muslim name... After 4th time the same announcement was made i realized that they were actually calling me... How embarrassing???? Everyone might have thought am deaf... Oh my god...

It was 27th April 2009 exactly at 3:15 AM when my flight landed in chennai... With swadesh background (jus inside my heart, he he he...) i stood in emigration Q... There were 4 general Qs and 1 special Q for physically challenged and senior citizens... There came our guy.... One guy in khaki uniform came near me and asked me whether am interested in jumping the general Q and join the special Q.. I jus thought for a second.. Am not a physically challenged guy and hell not am a senior citizen... Then why this guy is asking me to join the special Q??? Then i realised... Oh yes... Am back to India... Then i said am fine with this Q... Later he got another guy who is interested to move to the special Q and he was given a special respect... The khaki guy even carried his bag for him.. That's what we call customer service... Ha ha ha....
I know it's too much... Let's stop this...

So this is the most sentimental moment for me... Yes.. Am meeting my mom, bro and my dad after 2 years... I also saw few of my friends faces there... Yep... It was really a nice moment to see all of em after a very long time... But everyone was in a state of astonishment to see the slenderized version of me... ;-P

That morning was the most exciting moment for me... I jus had a quick nap and woke within 2 or 3 hours... I met someone whom i was dying to meet... I really can't express it in words... It's a feeling to be rejoiced..... Don wanna say more about it... I still remember that day... That will be remembered by me forever....

ARR's Magical Spell

2009-03-18T09:01:00.025+05:30

Disclaimer:

This article emerged solely out of my own thoughts. I haven't done any research to prove all these. So this can very well be contradicted or concurred per individuals thoughts and factual proofs.

Most of us might have wondered how ARR's music fascinates majority of the crowd. Even I had thought about the same many a times. Being an avid fan of ARR, I took the next step to analyze how he orchestrates each and every number in his albums. Looking at his discography, I think that he follows certain methodology in his albums.

Hunting Fresh Talents

Generally he opts for new, fresh voices/musicians rather than popular faces. During the past decade, he introduced most of the singers starting from Hariharan/Minmini in Roja, till Ash king in Delhi-6. But these guys are not amateur singers but are real professionals just lacking opportunity. He finds them and exploits their talent. By doing this he has 2 advantages, 1) When we listen to the song we hear a new voice which adds a new flavor to the song and so definitely draws our attention. 2) He gives ultimate freedom to the new singers/musicians to improvise the song in their own way such that he gets 200% fruitful result. Being their debut song, these guys will give their utmost effort to make the song better and also adds colors to the song. And the final result, wow an enchanting outcome. One of my friends complains this, that ARR tries to gain credits for others work. But i can't totally agree this. It's his own note, rhythm and just for the sake of improvisation the credit shouldn't go to the singers/musicians.

Processed Music

He seldom uses raw music in his composition in contrast to Ilaiyaraja who always uses raw music. Sometimes we will be blindfolded while listening to ARR's songs. We can hardly key out the instrument used in the song. He uses keyboard and processes raw music to produce a new music that has a refreshingly new flavor than the original. In my latest favorite - Mausam & escape from Slumdog millionaire he used a new instrument as base. After enjoying the song I was just perplexed as i was not sure about the instrument he used. I couldn't resist myself from knowing it. I googled it and finally came to know that he used 'Sitar'. That too played by a novice 'Azad'. Again #1 holds true here. This song is simply amazing and should have won Oscars.

New Genre

While most of the contemporary music directors are accustomed to plagiarism he's the one who uses a different technique. He doesn't steal others' tune but he influences others' genre. None can question that or find fault in it. I will explain it. For e.g take the Taxi Taxi song from Sakkarakatti. I know that this song topped the chart for months and became the anthem of young crowd. If you see the reason, it's not just the tune that attracted the crowd but also the type of music. This kinda music falls under Reggaeton genre which is new to Tamil as well as India but which is prevalent in Latin America. If you had visited any of the pubs or watched VH1 during early 2007 you might have heard the song 'Gasolina' by Daddy Yankee. This is one of it's kind. There are several songs in this genre by Daddy yankee, Reggaeton Niños. But this is new to Tamil and hence it won. Similarly the fusion music, coalition of carnatic base and soft rock. E.g Alaipayuthey from alaipayuthey,Love check from Parthale paravasm. Yuvan, highly inspired by this tuned a similar song 'Kanda naal muthalai" in kanda naal muthal. If you listen to it intensely you may find a strong correlation between this song and alaipayuthey song. Then songs with a pinch of Ghazal touch - Manmohini morey from Yuvraaj, Bhor Bhaye from Delhi-6 etc that has a Ghazal base in his own style.

While reciting this, I ought to make a point about Dil gira kahin par from Delhi-6. OMG... What a composition, I just keep on listening to this song every day and night. He used lead guitars as base and used a magical and romantic voice of Ash king without which the song wouldn't have emerged like this. After the first note, he does something that seems like fusing violin, followed by Scottish bag pipes, followed by Irish folk music bit. Still am yet to identify the instruments used in that part. But i can assure u,only legend like him can really do that. This song is a perfect example for all the points mentioned above, #1 new voice - Ash king, #2 processed music that sounds like/actually bagpipes and violin, #3 New genre of using Scottish and Irish folk music.

The above said points are just add-ons... There may be more like this.. But am not sure about the intricacy of Music ocean... Whatever it's... Either a new genre or a new voice, none can doubt this prodigy's inborn sheer talents because of which he's going places and will be... I feel am just lucky to be in his era....

Trip to the Lone Star State

2009-03-06T08:26:00.048+05:30

It all started on a valentine's day.... Nothing special about that day except that we had a conf call on that day...

We as in Deepak, Pravin, Rathna, Shiva and I...

This time we wanted to spend our time in Austin,TX... We had just decided, but didn't move further... It was only on the valentine's day we booked our tickets to Austin... And that means - fun unlimited.... We never knew that RK had already booked the ticket... He was in India, busy with his engagement (எல்லாருக்கும் வயசாகிட்டே போகுது !!!!)... And finally pravin dropped his plan since he had an exam that week... Later he regretted a lot for missing this fun and frolic...
So redefining 'we' - Deepak, RK, Rathna, Shiva and I...

I was very much thrilled not cos of visiting a new place but cos of meeting my good old buddies nearly after 4 years... And finally the day arrived.... Feb 27th 2009....

Everyone reached Austin that evening itself and I was the last one to reach there... It's really fun to see our friends, that too after a very long gap... Shiva and Deepak hasn't changed much... But i couldn't believe RK's stature... But when i talked with him,... Oh yes... He's one and the same... "Old habits die hard"...

And there started our lark... I really don wanna talk a lot about that night... Dancing, singing, praying,blabbering, all INGssssss... I still couldn't believe that one guy knelt down and prayed like a saint though he's somewhat agnostic in real...

But exactly at 3 AM we ended up trashing shiva's comforter and cleaning the carpet cos of one imbecile schmuck... A close call for me as i was sleeping beside him ;-)

The next day we embarked upon our road trip to corpus christi, a nearby city... Had lunch in an authentic south indian cuisine... Knowingly or unknowingly we

started addressing others with respect... We addressed others as "Sir" instead of their actual name... Thanks to "Saroja" movie...
Corpus christi is a bay area and we took a halt in one of the beaches... We thought of paddling in the sea... But the climate was tooooo cold and we just took few snaps & left that place...

The next pit stop was at the River walk,San Antonio... People told me that, this place is similar to Venice. And believe me, it was simply amazing... A narrow river of 10 - 15 ft wide between two streets... The entire street of about 2 miles was well lit by colorful twinkling lights... It's really a romantic place to hang out with your spouse... Sad that we went there as a guys only group :-(

Here I realized that few of us has really become a photographic freak.... Not me :-( They started talking greek and latin in photography - exposure, foc length, apperture, etc... Not cos they knew it but cos someone like me didn't know about it ;-) Whenever i hear a shrilling excited voice that says "Oh my god... what a pic!"... It's time to move away from that environment, else i would be pushed to a position where i need to comment on a picture... தமிழ்ல சொல்லனும்னா ஆர்வ கோளாறு.. Or i could politely say over curiosity.... After all these fun we finally reached Austin by 2 A.M.

Next day we headed towards Hamilton park, small mountain nigh a river bed. This is some sort of trekking place and a must visit place for avid mountaineers... But we ??? LOL.... After spending sometime near the river we went to Hamilton Pool reserve... This place has a small pool and verrrrry verrry small water falls... Actually the water was just dripping... We thought of taking a quick dip in the pool, even this time we didn't, not cos of the weather but cos of some unknown reasons...

We then maneuvered to a lake side Mexican Restaurant - Hula hut... Wow!!!!! Yummy yummy yummy... We had Chicken Chile Rellenos and Martini.... That was really a mouth watering moment... Not only cos of the food but also cos of ravishing dazzling gorgeous hispanic chicks ;-) I got to admit this.... Oh no... We got to admit this truth... We clicked several pics here and well cos of obvious reason... We then reached a view point "Mount Bonnell" to enjoy the sunset... Again it's a lovely romantic place... Damn... we were the only guys group there :-(

After reaching Austin we had a calcutta style (imp point to be noted) cuisine prepared by the host Shiva sir... We then played poker and slept around 3 am....

We didn't have much of a plan for the third day... RK left to Chicago that morning itself... So the group shrank to 4... We had 3 options, kayaking or bowling or visit a snooker club... After a hefty lunch in another indian restaurant, we ended up going to the bowling alley... After 2 games we dropped Deepak at the aiport and we 3 went to a Movie.... I swear... This is definitely not a movie to go as a guys group... Am still wondering, what the gal at the ticket counter might have imagined about us... Oh yes... The movie was Milk...

And that was the end of our trip.....
Few of our clicks are here...

Somewhere I Belong

2009-02-21T20:58:00.018+05:30

Since today morning I've been asking the same question to myself.

Do i belong here?

Am so confused and dunno where will i get the answer.

Decisions maketh life.

I consider choosing my college was one of the crucial decisions of my life, though there are many...

I still remember. My mom told me to choose either of the 2 options, REC - CSE or PSG - ECE. From my childhood i was obsessed with REC. Dunno why. May be cos of my mom. She's from Trichy and used to recite many things about REC cos of house-proud.

But at that moment, i chose PSG. Still am thinking why i opted for that? Cos of ECE fever that prevailed at that time? May be.

But now am thinking what would I be if I chose REC.

I may not be writing this blog, I may not be here, I may not have got my friends,.... There are lotsa may and may nots for what am now...

Indirectly I've influenced someones' life as well.. Someone might have chosen this admit and his life might have changed...

Something like what's happening in the movie "The Butterfly effect"... watch it... You will see how a small decision of one person influences everyone around him...

But i wanna know.. Had i chosen the other option, what would i be now?

I know very well that, this is just an act of imbecility.... But am still searching for the answer....

Do I belong here

May be or may be not

Am i being insecure?

Am i troubled?

Am i scared?

May be or may be not

They know me

I know em

Do i have someone to be known?

May be or may be not

Am i the only one confused?

Have i felt this before?

Am i what i ought to be?

May be or may be not

I walk, I smile, I eat, I sleep, I cry,..

If not here

Somewhere I belong.

Iron Man

2009-02-15T22:29:00.033+05:30

It was a Friday (02/13/09)...

I hate earlier part of Fridays... Timesheet, offshore hours matching, status report - i hate these words... Many times i used to think what is the need for these status report... யாருயா இதெல்லாம் கண்டு பிடிச்சது? Oh we need to see where we actually stand.... Crap... At the least to get rid of this i need to go back to India.... I thought of completing all this junk work before noon so that i could do some other rubbish work afternoon... At last completed everything before noon...

Post lunch session - If you don't have any useful work after lunch, then one can experience dreamless slumber.... Even if you try to concentrate on your monitor, you will just see tortoise mosquito coil whirling inside it... Yeah I had the same feeling.... I tried to hear some heavy metal rock to make me awake.. No use... None can fool the nature... At last i decided to intake some caffeine to stimulate my brain... I hate the way people make coffee here... No milk, no sugar, just the coffee extract... Else to dense the coffee they'll add something called "Non-dairy Creamer" which contains all the chemicals needed to harm your body.... I just thought how i used to drink coffee in my home... A glass full of thick unadulterated milk... 3 teaspoon full of sugar.... 1 spoon of bru instant coffee powder.... I always wanted the coffee in a stainless steel glass... To check the quality of the coffee.... I will gently tap the glass (with coffee) against the floor... The sound should be "dhakk"... If it's "dhanngg", that tells that the milk is watery... That coffee is rejected at once....

But now.... God.... Anyways I badly needed a coffee to kill my sleep... I went to the lunch room and started brewing coffee... There came "that" man... Let me tell something about him....
He's actually one of the senior most programmers here... He's in his late 50s... He's staying in the same community where am staying... I know that he's a biker and swimmer... And so he comes to office by his cycle... His manager has given him special permission to go for swimming during the office working hours... Nice manager huh? This man is really amiable... We used to call him as "thatha"...

To kill the silence, i just started the conversation,,,

Me : Hi.. How are you?

Him: Hey Pranav... Am pretty good... How are u?

M: Fine. Thanks. So what's ur plan for the weekend?

H: Weekend... O yeah... I have a triathlon competition this Saturday...

M: Triathlon? So what's it? (this shows my interest/knowledge in sports)

H: Oh.. that's cycling, running followed by swimming....

M: Really???? So everything at a stretch??

H: Yes... First 18 miles of cycling, 10 miles of running finally 1 mile of swimming....

M: @#$^%$&^& (just dumb founded expression)

H: But the good thing is this week's weather is better... During the last competition, the weather was too bad... The outside temp was 45'F.... And it was colder inside the water.. So when i swam, my fingers became numb... i couldn't even move my fingers.... i was wearing a sweat suit and that made me to keep my body warm... But i couldn't help with my fingers as i need to use it for swimming....

M: (My god).... That's really cool... Oh not the water... But... u see... the competition, the swimming... (just a jabber talk)....

H: Yes... It's really cool...

M: But are you allowed to take any break during triathlon????

H: Oh yeah yeah.... There will be lotsa crazy crowd to cheer us.... They will be providin us Gatorade and water to keep us not to get exhausted cos of dehydration.... And we can take some pit stops if we want... But those stops are also accountable...

M: Oh that's good... So you can even take a quick nap if you want :-) ???

H: Yeah... But you know.... Am so rude and i won't even stop.... I just grab the drink from them and just vanish from that place....

M: So non-stop??? 18 + 10 + 1 = 29 miles (nearly 47 KMs)....

H: Yeah yeah...

M: So how about the track??? Is it elevated or plain?

H: Sometimes it's hilly and sometimes it's a smooth way.... We need to endure all this to complete the race...

M: Am just curious... Since when, are you into this?

H: I had my first athletic event on September 1995.... So nearly 13+ years....

M: (I just calculated his age, 13 years before... so he might be in his late 40s...) Are you an athlete during your school/college days???

H: Not like a proper athlete.. But i used to participate in sprints during my school days....

M: Cycling and swimming?

H: I used to ride bikes when i was a kid and i didn't find any difficulty in riding bikes.... And swimming... I just love it....

M: (Even i used to go to my school using a cycle... what's the use? Even now, i can't ride a cycle more than 5 miles... ) So why did you start all this???

H: I just wanted to participate in triathlon... I decided it on Apr 1995 and i took my first try on September 1995 and am continuing it till now.....

M: This is just great... So good luck for the competition....

H: Thanks.. And you know.... We still have room for another competitor... Like to join???

M: ----------------------

Well you might have easily guessed my answer.... He just left the cafeteria saying the last sentence.... I just stood there awestruck and was thinking what i would be doing at his age (if am alive).... May be with my grand kids, reading newspapers,gardening (courtesy - tamil/hindi movies - this is what all gramps are doing in the movies)....

I was not at all feeling drowsy after that.... He woke me up.... I just learnt the following lessons from him...

1) No age limit to fulfill your passion

2) You just need inner propulsion to achieve your goal

For me, he's the "Iron Man"....

Love verse for Her

2009-02-14T21:27:00.014+05:30

This is for UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!

Everyday is my day

when you are with me to mend my way

I will walk u along the shore in the twilight

with your hand holdig mine tight

While the chilled sea touches our feet

as the sky covers us like a sheet

As we walk we feel the zephyr

which shower us more pleasure

I love to walk you miles

just to see your smiles

I haven't given u any love letter

but i have millions of unknown words to utter

And I will always be there for you!!!!!!!!

Rowthiram Pazhagu

2009-02-03T09:26:00.000+05:30

Have you decided your next topic?

Hmmm... Still thinking.

Why?

In contrast to the first post i feel some difficulty in this.

What's that?

The first one was just a 'Yes/No' question.

So?

But this question has multiple answers. Actually the answers are legion.

Oh fine dude... Just decide something...

Still thinking...

May be this???

Nope...

May be that???

No way... K fine... I've decided it.... Stop messing around....

I told that sometimes I feel astounded at certain things... This is one of em... To be precise this is just a snippet of a poem...

"ROWTHIRAM PAZHAGU"

Most of us might have heard it somewhere. This is nothing but a snippet from Mahakavi Bharathiyar's "Puthiya Aathichudi".

A few days back I was listening to the song "Acham thavir" from Anjathe. And suddenly there was a spark in my mind when I heard the line "Rowthiram Pazhagu".... Then i started analysing this....

Anger.... More often than not, one of the worst emotions and everybody hates that... Then my mind started rolling few years back...

During my school days my mom used to (and still) recite(s) that her elder son (yeah that's me) is a calmmmmmmmmm and quiet guy who seldom gets angry and my brother is really splenetic...

So in general everybody likes a calm guy... But why did such a pioneer, a prodigy and a great intellect like Mahakavi ask us to practice or learn to be angry... That perplexed me a lot... So I came to a conclusion that am not getting the actual meaning that was connoted...

I tried to analyse this further.... After many hours of cerebration I got the real meaning.. Or at the least I just got a convincing meaning...

Many of us doesn't know that each and every human emotion is a source of energy. We'll do extraordinary and unusual things whenever we are drenched in any of the emotions...

E.g : Your friends may be pestering you for a treat for no good reason. But if a gal (whom you are ogling for a very long time) just gives a glimpse and if the same friend asks you for a treat at that time... That's it.. Like Alaipayuthey madhavan... "Ava enna pathutta!!!! Enna pathu sirichutta!!!!!!! Heyyyyyyyy!!!!!!!!".....

The answer is none other than "Yes"...

This is nothing but a mere imbecility....

Yeah and i don't have better example :-(

So whenever we are happy, sad, angry, etc enormous amount of energy flows throw our body with the help of adrenalin and make us to do wonders...

Mahakavi got this instinct well before the cyber age and crafted a very beautiful poem...

So when we are happy, we'll try to make others happy. When we are sad, we try to share our melancholy with our friends,family to half the sadness...

But what do we do if we get angry??? Fine... Let me rephrase the question. What will I do if am angry?

Either I will let my anger go by reciprocating it right away with much more rage...

Or I will keep it inside me and worry about it often...

Am doing a very big mistake here.... Both the approaches are fallacious... In the first one am just letting my whole energy to drain at some trivial things... In the second approach am not at all using the energy...

So what should i do now?

Lemme think... When will you get angry?

When something/somebody insults me, during some failures, when something/somebody acts against my wish....

Lemme do this...

Whenever such things happen, do not let your energy drain into some petty things... Whenever someone insults you , just keep it inside... Experience it, Feel it, suffer it and take right steps to win it... To endure this we need abundant energy and that will come from our anger.... This is what they call as "Controlled Anger".

And this is what Mahakavi wants us to understand.... Turning a negative point/weakness to 100% positive point...

And finally i got the gist of the snippet....

"Controlled anger is the best source of energy and great success"...

And I was thinking about all these sitting in front of my computer doing nothing and oh god am in my office... I just made sure that none is looking at me... Thank god, else everyone will think that am such a schmuck...

I didn't even know how much time i spent on this but i never regretted for the lost time as I got an useful tip...

Hollooooooooooo and i just finished my second post.....

Prologue

2009-01-24T21:24:00.000+05:30

Why am I doing this?

Dunno

Is it really necessary?

Dunno

Is this because everyone does this?

Dunno

Oh yes.. Now this has become a modus vivendi of young generations... That's why???

Oh crap...

You told me not be a part of orkut

Yep...

Then why are you asking me to do this?

I said I Dunnnnnnnnnooooooooooooooo...

Will you continue this?

May be...

So tomorrow you will write the epilogue even w/o a single episode?

May be...

Are you a whacky nut???

ha ha ha....

Holy #$%^.. Get lost....

Oh yes... The above tête-à-tête is not between two weird persons.... Its between me and myself... Strange.. isn't it?

Whenever I wanna decide something, most of the times my mind and heart will stick to the same decision. But sometimes.......... there are some contention....

The above is one of them....

So whenever my Neural Instincts and Cardio Instincts are vying like this, I just pursue what my heart says... Heart will always take benevolent decision... But brain use to ask lotsa questions before deciding anything.... But before taking any decision I just ask one petite question to my brain... Will this decision gonna mentally or physically hurt somebody??? If the answers is 'No", am game for that....

Oh yes... And all these questions are for this,

"Whether should I blog or not?"

Oh yes..... My brain responded with a positive nod...

I use to think a lot.... Just thinking... Nothing in action (as usual - shame on me :-( )... So day before yesterday when I was driving back to my apartment after an elusive workout(!!! nice joke), I realized that am spending lots of time in just thinking and most importantly I can't remember anything that came to my mind few months back(it's not coz of amnesia) ... Coz am not taking anything seriously.... Jus think of something and just forget it forever... It's scientifically proven that 29% of the thoughts that wandered in a human mind will revisit his/her mind some other day.... So when the same thought revisits my mind, I get a feeling that I have just ignored it.... I wanna give some meaning to my thoughts.... Transferring my thought to some meaningful entity... And this post is a stepping stone towards meeting that reality...

Most of the time my thoughts sway a lot.... Sometimes they rivet on something futile,something strange, something whirling,... Sometimes I wonder about various things... Sometimes I feel astounded looking at certain things... Sometimes i envy something... Sometimes am proud of something... Here am gonna pen down whatever comes to mind......